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Bored Panda 2020-08-19 23:30:07

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Hey Pandas, What Is The Rudest Thing Anyone Has Said To You?

So it was like sixth grade I think, and we were playing knockout. There was a kid (lets call him Bob because I don't know how to spell his name) anyway, you either like him or you hate him. He hated me for some unknown reason. Anywho, bob was right in front of me in line and he kept scooting forward and saying things like "eww" or dont get too close" Later, He shot and missed, and I got him out and everyone was cheering. The look on his face was wonderful!

Hey Pandas, What’s The Funniest Thing That Has Ever Happened To You?

so I was walking down the hallway with my classmate Henry when we see Anish, we say hi, he says hi, 3 seconds later another "Anish" appears- seemingly out of thin air, we say hi, he says hi, 3 seconds later a third "anish" shows up to the scene. My classmate: The Anish reproduces asexually, via mitosis, at a rate of 1 Anish every 3 seconds

Hey Pandas, What’s The Funniest Thing That Has Ever Happened To You?

I have a fish, and one day I was looking around for my book when I realized I didn't feed my fish that day. I look into the tank and see my fish staring at a point in my room. I feed the little fish and then look at where my fish was staring. Lo and behold, my book!

Hey Pandas, What’s The Funniest Thing That Has Ever Happened To You?

Don't know if it is funny, but certainly a happy one for me. So it was back in the 90s, I was madly in love with this girl. It was at the time when I had quit my job and started my own business. Everything was going well and we were planning to get married. But her single mother suddenly started opposing as I don't have a permanent job, and she won't do anything against her mother's will as she was her only child. So, I became sad and lost. One day two of my friends called me and took me on a trip to make me feel better. We started exploring western side of the country and after two or three days, we ended up in this bar. My friends got boozed up, and I was sitting alone thinking about her. I couldn't control myself and started crying. The bartender was a nice guy, he showed interest in me and asked me my story. I told about her and showed her photo and all. He tried to cheer me up and he was like everything will be alright, don't lose hope etc. We continued the trip and reached home after few days. I wanted to meet her desperately and I went straight to her house and knocked the door. But, it was a guy who opened the door and invited me in. He was her uncle (her mom's brother) He asked about my family, business and all and finally he said he and his sister are okay with my wedding. I was shocked. I couldn't believe what just happened. Turns out he was living in the west and was a friend of the bartender who I spoke to. Thing is that I showed her photo and forgot to take it back. Bartender told my story to him and showed the photo. Her uncle, being the gentleman he is, went to her house and spoke to her mom and convinced her. Anyway, we are getting ready to celebrate our 28th anniversary in few months.

Hey Pandas, What’s The Funniest Thing That Has Ever Happened To You?

This isn’t my story but my parent’s story. My dad was just engaged with my mum pretty much a week before this. They were at a cafe with my mum’s parents and they were sitting outside. My dad got a Coke can while the others got coffee. Then a bee landed on his coke can. He flicked it off and as soon as he flicked it my grandpa leaned over exposing just a tiny bit of his crack. My dad flicked it right into that crack and then my grandpa started running around yelling his butt was on fire. My dad then had to help him get the stinger out in the bathroom.

Hey Pandas, What’s The Funniest Thing That Has Ever Happened To You?

I was working at a distribution center for a major retail chain around Christmastime unloading trucks. For those who don't know, the trucks are filled in "walls" of product that you slowly take down to unload it. I was throwing a truck full of toys, when the wall in front of me destabilized and came tumbling down on me (i was fine, just startled). I looked at the boxes, and it was cases and cases of Jenga.

Hey Pandas, What’s The Funniest Thing That Has Ever Happened To You?

This literally happened within seconds when I was alone. I cracked a raw egg on the edge of the frying pan to scramble it. It missed, heading for the floor. With reflexes that still astound me, I snatched a nearby utensil & actually caught the raw egg mid-air!! Elation turned to astonishment as the egg hit the floor. The utensil was a slotted spoon..... Speed of light successions of feelings: "Oh No!", "Yes!!", "A SLOTTED spoon!!??!!" Never laughed so much cleaning a floor.

Hey Pandas, What’s The Funniest Thing That Has Ever Happened To You?

On mischief night (the night before Halloween) I was out soaping car windows with some friends. I came to a car and began soaping the front windshield when I saw this huge furry thing in the front seat. I called my friend over to see this incredible sight. Then it split open and I could see flesh emerging. It was a couple doing the nasty under a fir coat. Before I realized what it was I croaked out; "its a MONSTER!!!". Then realizing what it was, we ran away laughing and I was lucky I didn't soil myself!